Michael and me

Scott Allman, (no, no relation so don't ask...although he is Laurie Allmans brother, and he was in a band called The Flying Tigers which was managed by Johnny "Rock n' Roll" Sinclair, who managed the MC5 and who was friends with John Lennon so he knew some people who knew some people who may have been distant relations, still, that doesn't make him an actual Allman Brother....)
...anyway, Scotty and I had lockers next to each other in Jr. High School, and we both lived in New Mexico in the early 70's and over the years our paths have crossed in many and varied ways.

These days he is a videographer and produces an award winning cooking show called "Fork In The Road", which is seen nationally on Public Television and features foods from and locations in Michigan and around the Midwest. (http://www.forkintheroadtv.com/). It's a very entertaining program and presents the Midwest and Michigan in an unique and informative way.

But that's not why you called.

Recently there has been some blowback from our State Legislature about the Michigan Film Incentives law. Even though the Incentives have succeeded in making Michigan the most fiscally attractive state in the union to make movies in, and they have been wildly successful in bringing Hollywood to Michigan, there are some who are afraid that they are requiring us to give back too much of the money we would not have had if the incentives did not exist...

What?

Okay, as simply as possible here's the deal: The State generated $120 million dollars in revenue from filmmakers who made movies here in the past six months. The only reason they made movies here is because The State told them they would get $40 million dollars back in the form of tax credits. They could have made their movies anywhere, but it was suddenly way cheaper to make them here instead. So they did. They get $40 million back, we get $80 million we would not otherwise have had. Some of our State lawmakers think we could still get that business without offering the incentives. There's a lot more to the story, but that's keeping it simple.

Scotty called me a couple of weeks ago and suggested that we make a short film about the Michigan Film Incentives and the impact they are making on people and communities around the state.

So I made some appointments with some State Legislators and with people at the film office and we started making this movie and this guy, Ken Droz at the Michigan Film Office called me last week and said, "Hey, Michael Moore is going to be in town this week for a meeting with the Film Commission. Here's a contact from his office you can call and maybe he would be in your movie."

So I made a couple of calls to Michael Moores people and they said they would check with him and let me know if he would meet with us long enough to get some sound-bites and get him on film.

Well, back and forth and blah blah, yak yak and we never heard back with a yes or a no. So Friday rolls around and Scotty and I look at each other and say "Dude, let's just go down there with the equipment and set it up. What's the worst that can happen, he says no?? Big deal, we've
been told no before."

So we did.

And we get downtown to the Film Office and we park the van and I'm helping Scott unload equipment and I look over my shoulder and guess who's getting out of the van in back of us? Yup. Michael Moore. So I yell to him, "Hey Mr. Moore!" And he flinches and tries to make himself small, (yeah, that's not happening. That right there is a big man trying to get small...), so I go up to him and introduce myself and give him Scott's bona fides and explain what we're doing.

Turns out his people never told him about us, (yeah, probably their job to shield him from bozo's like us). But he's cool and apologizes and explains that he doesn't normally get into movies other than his own, but have a nice day and see you around.

Now I look at Scott and say, look we're here, we have no idea what this meeting is about, but let's go in and hang around and maybe an opportunity will present itself.

So we do.

Turns out it's the first meeting of the new Michigan Film Commission, and it's got all these people on the commission including legislators, union people, some movie people, and a few others.

I look at the agenda and see that there is a time set aside at the end of the meeting for public comments.

Well, you know me, I never met a public I didn't want to comment to, so I bided my time and when the opportunity arose I stood up commented publicly about the great opportunities afforded me as a Michigan Actor by these great incentives and explained my role with Val Kilmer and Armand Assanti in "Steam Experiment"

("You see Mr. Chairman, I like to call them Val and Armand")

and how cool it was "for a guy with limited talent and a 38 inch waist" and how I never would have had this great role if it wasn't for these great incentives bringing Hollywood to Michigan and about halfway through my remarks the Chair interrupted me and said to the whole room, "I like this guy!" and by this time Michael Moore is looking at me and smiling real big and I go on to tell the room that my friend Scott and I are making this little movie and we'll be handing out business cards 'cause we're going to want to get some of you all on film, for sure.

So afterwards I'm talking to Mike and he's real cool and encouraging and wants to look at our little deal when we get it done and we part as new BFF's.

As we were talking I say, "Mike, dude, you tried to make yourself look real small when I shouted hey in the parking lot" and he says, "Yeah, it's true. People either like me or really dislike me. The people who dislike me are pretty intense about it, and even the people who like me don't like me that much. Whenever someone shouts my name in public, I always wonder if it's the last thing I'll hear."

So. Like I said. Long story...pretty funny, but long.